"It is with great joy and hope that I , Barlandt De Bearlengraad, bastard lineage to the King of Cormyr, declare the intended marriage of myself to the Lady Bertha, a highly respected server at the Misty Falls Keep. Among her many life achievements, she bears the cherished title of "First Runner Up" from the VIC pagent of last year. ( known locally as Village Idiots Convention ).
We look forward to progeny, and family in the years to come, fully qualifying for heirship of the family wealth, as declared by Grand Matron Bearlengraad.
Please note, there is no need to speak to Bertha, as is commonly known, there is no reason to encourage opinion in women. "